This kind of shoe is perpetually banal, no matter how you try to remix it. I repels irony, it dampens good humor, and it has a limitless supply of frump. It should not be fetishized or celebrated or appropriated. Your aesthetic cannot penetrate it; your art is dulled by it. The boat shoe is merely a foil; it exists to remind you that not everybody can afford a big boat.
(Kiddies, this is what happens "boat shoes" lands on a list of acceptably trendular footwear: Yer Poppa gets his tubesocks in a twist.)