PUT ME ON THE VETERANS COMMITTEE, AND WE'LL GET THIS DONE

It hit me today, out of nowhere: Bruce Willis should be noted in the Rock & Roll Hall of Fame for one reason: He made it permanently uncool for white men to play the harmonica. It's like a super-möbius Spinal-Tapping of the instrument. That is, if you see any rockin' white man play the cross-harp or blues-harp or whatever you wanna call it -- even a known talent such as Mick Jagger, whose reputation precedes Willis's hackery -- the specter of Bruno floats on the margins, poisoning the moment. His honking is a cosmic parody, an unshakable one.