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November 10, 2008

PROPOSAL

You're in a foreign city. The language barrier is daunting or perhaps impenetrable, but you're surrounded by people who have some formal education and/or cross-cultural exposure. You have to take a shit. You don't want the indignity of pointing at your own ass in a frantic way or shouting something like, "WHERE ... IS ... THE ... TOILET!" This is a communications issue that the human race should've settled a long time ago. There's an international sign for choking, and it seems to work quite well, so I argue that there should be one for I will soon soil my pants if you don't direct me to the proper facilities. Below you'll see my suggested gesture, which is built off the idea of "number two" being a synonym for "shit." It also employs a double-pound for emphasis:

Let's consider it a "beta" test for now. I'm not sure sure about the universality of the gesture. But I'm certain that there are plenty of smart people who can help me refine this. In any case, such a nonverbal expression could be quite handy and discreet, even in situations where everybody already speaks the same language.

NOTE: It's possible that this gesture could be misinterpreted as, "I urge you to play a game of Rock-Paper-Scissors with me."

Posted by JW at 10:27 PM | Permalink

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Comments

Language barrier?

Perhaps there's an argument for Esperanto after all!

Check http://www.lernu.net for evidence.

Posted by: Brian Barker at Nov 11, 2008 11:29:10 AM

i believe the current prevailing guesture is placing a flat hand of closed fingers placed just below the beltline. Point being, indicating lower GI discomfort is sufficient, no need to point to your ass.

Also, pointing at one's ass is a prevailing guesture of a very different sort.

Posted by: Dr. Fantastic at Nov 12, 2008 1:36:54 PM

Doctor: The flat-hand-below-the-waistline gesture could be mistaken for, "my fupa is irritated."

Posted by: JW at Nov 12, 2008 4:04:48 PM

The Cesspool has pointed out an egregious omission, given that there's already an international symbol for the shocker.

Posted by: Lovely Man at Nov 15, 2008 12:46:53 PM

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